Disability Pride

I feel like every month there is a new hashtag on social media. A new calendar of dedicated themes. One that is currently going around in the disability community is #disabilitypridemonth . Seems strange to me, especially following huge celebrations & displays like pride month for the LGBTQ community. I’ll admit that I think you should rock the shit out of whatever your situation is but disability pride is an interesting one.

Am I proud to be a quadriplegic? Absolutely not. I wouldn’t wish this disability on my worst enemy. That doesn’t mean that I don’t carry myself with pride in all aspects of life. I try to own quadriplegia & make the most out of every day. 

I am extremely proud, however, to represent things inside of the disability community. Artwork, creative writing, motivation, gaming, being a good friend; son, uncle, human being, whatever. Those are things that I’m proud of. But paralysis specifically? That’s a big nope.

I get anxious and embarrassed now. Stressed out in some unfamiliar crowds. My mind is constantly full of “what-if” scenarios and it sometimes keeps me from pursuing things that my past self would be all over. I made a pact to myself that I wouldn’t let new insecurities hold me back in this new existence. It is sometimes easier said than done, but that is what disability pride means to me.

I often think about how I would live my life if this paralyzed body was all that I knew. If I didn’t know what it was like to exist outside of therapies and prosthetics. My worries are my current mental block, but would I even have them if I didn’t have my 23 “ healthy” years? I give my kudos to anyone in the disability community. 

I am proud of the man I am. I am proud knowing that my niece & Godson know me as the FUNcle and someone to look up to. That they grow up seeing me always getting after it! Proud that my family and friends know me as a kind and loyal man. My fiancé knows me as a compassionate and grounding companion. One day my kids are going to know me as a steady provider & source of love and comfort. 

What I am proud of has nothing to do with my disability. I could just as easily be a miserable prick from my wheelchair. But what kind of existence would that be? I am proud of myself and to me, that’s what matters!

God Bless!