Respect Your Elders

Last Friday I had the opportunity and honor to speak with a small group of men and women living at the local assisted living in town. I am a firm believer that we should pick the brains of our community of elders from past generations. We have a lot to learn from them.

It felt odd to be telling my story and speaking about my experiences to a group that has had so much more life lived than I have. I felt the same way when I spoke to the local police department because I had grown up idolizing them and I got to sit there and explain what it felt like to get shot. It’s just an odd and humbling feeling to have an experience that not many people have had. 

Alright, let me backtrack here. When Kass and I first started dating long distance, she was volunteering once a week at the assisted living. She would go in with the activities director, Carolyn and Kass would play Boggle with everyone. I remember telling Kass that my family loves Boggle and that I would have to tag along next time I was home. In reality, I just wanted to witness Kass in her element. She would rave about how much she loved her time spent there with the elders and how incredible the community was. I was beaming the whole time that I was there watching her do her thing. It was right around the holidays so I got to come home a few times in the span of a couple months. It gave me the opportunity to visit and play Boggle a few extra times with everyone and talk to the older veterans and watch Kass’s craft. Carolyn was incredible for letting me visit and she catapulted Kass right into a career field that she loved. After I left and went back to Fort Lewis, Kass started interning under Carolyn. I would get the daily phone call while she was on lunch break always raving about this career field. I loved how happy it made her. Eventually Kass started a full time job at a memory care facility in Massachusetts as a recreation assistant. She crushed it day in and day out. 

Kass is now my care giver and I wholeheartedly believe that everything that she learned working with assisted living and memory care was for a reason. It made the transition that much easier. I don’t believe in predestination or anything like that but if God knew that this was going to happen to me, then He gave me all of the tools to deal with my injury. He gave me an upbeat and stubborn attitude. He gave me my brother right when I would need him the most. He gave me a crazy support system and not just one, but two families that would do anything to help and support me. He gave me loving friends that always have my back. But most of all, He gave me a woman that would never give up on love. Kass changed the entire dynamic of her life and she cares for my body and my heart. But God also gave Kass the tools to perform her new found craft and I am not naive to that fact. God is good!

Now, back to the assisted living facility. I enjoy conversing with people that have experiences that I have never had. I love learning and leaving somewhere that much wiser and that happens every time that I leave the assisted living. I read A LOT of books written by veterans. It helps me kill time and also learn. I have read a book from each country that participated in the First World War simply because I realized that I didn’t know much about it. My plan is to do the same with WW2, Korea, Vietnam and then all of the wars in the Middle East. I quickly realized that these men experienced horrors that I can only imagine and we are losing veterans at an insane rate. The men who fought. The women that worked back home to support the war efforts. To now where men and women fight together in different theaters. So many experiences that I don’t know about. 

I started talking to the men and women last Friday with a bulleted list prepared. I started hitting my points regarding adjusting to loss of independence and the importance of accepting help and I quickly realized that my list was pointless. I had so many questions for them but oddly enough they had so many questions for me. I ditched my plan and it quickly became a conversation. I loved it. These men and women were so interested in my life and I felt truly humbled. I cannot wait until Kass and I are able to go back for a game of Boggle! 

My main takeaway here is that you should always respect your elders and pick their brains. We have so much to learn from them; experiences, history, ways of life. Reach out and converse. 

God Bless!